In this video I’m going to be talking about projections and specifically about the way projections and intuition can overlap and cause us a lot of confusion both in our life and in our relationships. Before I dive into that, I want to let you know that I wrote a book for you, Align: Living and Loving from the True Self, is a comprehensive map of how to come back home to the truth of who you are, and how to live from this deeply sacred place within yourself, and how to honor your alignment as you connect with the people in your life, and the line is available on Amazon and Barnes and noble Com. I also created these self-guided alignment cards. There’s 48 cards in a deck, and each card has a wisdom teaching and a sentence stem to support you and living and loving from your true self. And these are available on my website, the spiritually aligned.com
I don’t know about you but as a very intuitive being, I have had some very humbling experiences with projections in my life and when first I’ll just define a projection a projection is when we’re denying something inside of ourself, and we’re putting it on to somebody else. We’re assigning the blame to somebody else as we deny our own experience. So an example of a projection is, if you see in your partner that they are being controlling, and you want them to change. And you’re denying inside of yourself that you are trying to control them by wanting them to change. And you’re denying this experience within yourself.
Now, this doesn’t mean that your partner isn’t controlling. It just means that you’re seeing something in them. And you’re also projecting something onto them. And this is why projections can be so confusing, but also so powerful when we can begin to see the way that we put our experience on to other people, and we start owning that and being curious about what’s happening with ourselves, we can come back into alignment and stop getting pulled off center through a projection.
So in Gestal therapy, which is what I teach at the university here, and it’s what I’ve been practicing in part for so many years. In my private practice. we see projections as a contact boundary disturbance, meaning that when a person has unresolved finish business from the past unfinished business from the past. They are working it out currently in an attempt to find completion. So anything that they experienced in the past that is living in their subconscious mind that they don’t know that they are unresolved with. They will continually work out right now with the people in their lives, and this prevents them from being really present. and our presence is what allows us to be in embodiment and spiritual alignment.
And so, when we start to resolve our unfinished business and start healing our relationship with the past, and creating more clarity and understanding about the way our past experiences has influenced our mind and our conditioned patterns then we have more clarity where we can see the people in our life as they are not as we see them to be. So the more we resolve unfinished business, the more our intuitive knowing begins to open when we are highly intuitive beings and we still have unresolved from business from the past, and we aren’t quite sure yet how to turn towards our felt experience and honor the sensations in our body, and be curious about our own blind spots, and what’s happening inside of ourselves in our shadow.
Then we can really really cling to our projections and believe that they are true. And we? It’s actually a trap that we set for ourselves when we intuitive, and we are seeing something. But we are sort of seeing it through this projection. At the same time. And so the key here is to honor ourselves and to allow ourselves to not only be curious about what’s happening inside of us but own that something is happening inside of us, even if we would rather assign it to somebody else. If this person stopped doing this thing, I would feel more peace. I would feel more calm. I’d feel more regulated. But the curiosity about what’s happening inside of ourselves takes back that projection.
We start owning what we’re feeling. And then we can also see this other person clearly. Maybe they are doing something that we’re not available for that we don’t want to engage in, but we can own that as ours rather than projecting onto them and putting the full on us of the experience onto the other person. So anytime your mind has you convinced that other people need to change so that you can feel better? That is the immediate clue that you need to turn towards yourself and be curious about what is happening inside of you. Where might the thing that you’re saying to them about them also live inside of you. Where is that resonant vibration inside of you, and be with that with tremendous love and compassion and curiosity.
And even as you do that, maybe you can feel you come back home to yourself. The projection pulls you off yourself. The curiosity has you come back home to yourself, and then you can open from the place of truth, from the place of the truth of who you are.
I think that projections are such a powerful learning experience for us, and it is by human design that we project onto the world around us, and it takes tremendous consciousness and awareness and desire to grow and evolve in order to take back those projections and come back home to ourself. Once we’re here, we can really embody the truth of who we are and honor our intuition and our intuitive senses in a way that is so much more potent than when we are falling asleep to our true self by believing our projections.
And so with that, I want to remind you that I have some courses online that are available to you, living your alignment and spiritually aligned relationships and courses for therapists and coaches, for how to facilitate alignment through the lens of neurobiology in a trauma-informed way.
Blessings to you on your journey.